Chronic Computer Use

Today my Mother accused me of having an addiction to the computer. That's rich coming from someone who watches an average of eleven hours of cable television a day.

What I have is not an addiction to the computer, but rather an obsession with current affairs. My time spent at the PC doesn't always involve the internet either. For example, I'm using it right now to write this piece. I also use it to create politically charged memes, produce multi-track audio recordings, and even to analyze data sets. I wouldn't consider myself a computer expert, but I do possess the skill-set to perform some intermediate level spreadsheet operations, design web pages using HTML and CSS, interpolate multimedia sources, produce videos, and set-up a LINUX server.    

How did I acquire these skills? Did I attend some night classes at a community college? On-the-job training? Reading "For Dummies" books?

While it's true that I learned a few time saving tricks and keyboard shortcuts from a job I once had that required a certain level of adeptness and a familiarity with Microsoft Excel, the bulk of my computing abilities comes from a super-secret mystical intelligence source I'll refer to as advanced literacy. This literacy, coupled with my innate ability to methodically deduce relative truths, and a knack for performing simple Boolean operations in my mind, allows me the power to rapidly achieve desired results using computer applications. My willingness to learn the rudiments of programming languages and time saving techniques elevates me to a plateau high above the average end user. When it comes to computing, I have a can-do attitude. 

It might seem as though I'm selfishly boasting about my accolades, but I'm well aware that when it comes to computing I'm merely scratching the surface. Still, for a former guitar teacher and truck driver who's had very little formal computer training, and as someone who never set-out to be a computer expert, I think I've done rather well by any measurement of computer literacy. 

Maybe Mom's right in a sense - after all, I do have a highly addictive personality. If having the wherewithal to continuously add to one's knowledge base while honing one's ability to perform tasks can be classified as an addiction, then feel free to call me a full-blown chronic. My Mother has more than earned the right to spend her days sitting back, allowing herself to be endlessly and passively entertained by whatever streams in through the satellite - and to do so while passing judgement on her son for his active engagement in online politics. 

Good for her, I suppose. And maybe I do spend more time sitting at the computer than I should, typing stuff out at 111 w.p.m. and flipping graphic images between filters like some kind of pro. Regardless, in this current age of instantaneous information, I'd much rather be a capable driving force than some passive, computer illiterate media sponge who pays good money in subscription fees to sit around absorbing the MSM trickle. The skills required to independently participate in our modern information exchange aren't developed by NOT spending time at the computer!